When Facebook switched “become a fan” to “like,” we were admittedly devastated.

Becoming a fan of utterly random things such as ice cubes, bookmobiles and mustaches is what social networking is all about. Sure, it’s great to connect with new-to-the-Internet relatives and hi-remember-me folks, but we prefer pure irreverence. And declaring fandom of intimate objects seems too ridiculously pointless to be ignored.

If you’re an LEO or a just a huge LEO supporter, get your mouse clicker ready to “like” the following pages. But we’re going to still refer to you as a “fan.” So there.

1. Handcuffs – It’s no surprise this popular restraint devise has garnered 930 fans. While those who wear ‘em might not ‘like’ it, others surrounding them probably do. Latest post: “Cops never think it’s as funny as you do. They sent me a picture of me speeding, so I sent a picture of a check… so they sent me a picture of handcuffs.”

2. Canine Police Unit – Life on the canine police unit isn’t easy street. And with zero fans currently, it’s up to you to show this page some love. Latest post: “Just passed a police training seminar in the parking lot of the scottish right building parking lot, a police station and a cop canine unit. Scottish rite? Seriously? Yes.”

3. Badges – Flash this page to your friends, and they’ll think you’re really something. With a respectable 412 fans, you might become the only fan who actually owns one. Latest post: “Badges dress up day today at Hooter’s! I’ll be Mrs. Officer tonight…come see me lol!!!”

4. Parking tickets – Truthfully there were two fan pages for these little love notes. We chose the page with 70 fans because of its page description: “Parking tickets are the roads way of suggesting to idiots to learn how to read. Pictures make it so you don’t even need to know the language!” And you thought getting a ticket was shameful enough.

5. Police officers – Only 240 fans?! Come on LEO world, represent! Latest post: “169 dollar speeding ticket grrr.. God Bless Eagle County for having the most polite and HOT police officers in all the land…at least it wasn’t all bad.”

6. Dunkin’ Donuts – OK, OK … totally stereotypical. However, who doesn’t like donuts? They have more than 1.4 million fans. Hello, it’s time to join the crowd. Latest post: “I Found a Dunkin Donuts in Kuwait Got pics of me in front of it. there should be one on Sabattus st in Lewiston Maine so I wont have to go that far anymore )”

7. Flashlight – Nothing will equip you better in the heat of the night than this handheld light, which is apparently called “torch” outside of the U.S. Latest post: “Crazy morning today! The kid’s school had no electricity and I was sent back and asked to come back with a flashlight among more crazyness!”

8. Tactical Pants – Betcha didn’t see this one coming! The one and only spot on the ‘Book that celebrates uniform pants. Latest post: Reader’s Poll: ‘How much are you willing to spend on tactical pants?’”

9. Police Baton – Another essential piece of equipment. Unfortunately this page only has one fan! C’mon, doesn’t anyone else out there like twirling a baton? Latest post: “I <3 my police baton. The end.”

10. Gun Holsters – We admit to making this page ourselves specifically for this post. But gun holsters are awesome, so can you blame us? Latest post: “Gun Holster Basics: The basic function of a holster is to secure and hold a firearm, or another object, in a location where it can be easily accessed.”

11. Guns – To go along with gun holsters, of course. Except this page has 38,632 fans. Very impressive. And a little scary. Latest post: “Guns are safe, smart, and fun for the whole family.”

12. COPS – It’s everybody’s favorite TV show. And it’s one of the longest-running shows in American history. Latest post: “cops raided, plants pulled!!! ”

13. Police Scanner – How can a cop not like the police scanner? OK, don’t answer that… Latest post: “my mom just tolld me the police scanner was blowing up during the parade most streets we were on had atleast one person call the cops they were trying to track us down with calls”

Next week we’ll follow up this post with the top 10 Facebook pages for police departments and law enforcement-related foundations… promising to be a little more useful but a little less fun.

Did we leave any pages out? Let us know what Facebook pages are your favorite in the comment section below!

(Images via Wikimedia)

Alas! Our pants long to droop downward, where our feet oft nap;

Pockets contain many concealed treasures, forcing gravity to rule.

When the Earth’s natural pull succeeds, a faint wail of “O crap!”

For only a tactical belt can keep us from looking like such a fool.

Alright, alright. That’s it for today’s installment of tactical poetry.

As awful as our poem was, there is a method to our madness. That is to point you to the best tactical belts out there. Because without some extra support, we would all be lookin’ like a fool with our pants on the ground. And nobody wants that. Seriously.

So, what is a tactical belt exactly? Tactical belts are worn on the inside of belt loops—not to be confused with duty belts, which are worn on the outside of belt loops and accommodate pouches and holsters.

Here are six of the favorites.

1. Universal BDU Belt ($7.99) – Blackhawk’s lightweight belt is 1.75 inches wide, which should fit most tactical pants out there. And if you’re 52 inches or under, the belt will work like a charm. Available in black, desert brown, coyote tan and olive drab.

2. TDU Belt ($14.99) – Using heavy-duty nylon webbing and a low-profile plastic buckle, 5.11 created an affordable and durable belt that won’t set off those pesky metal detectors at the airport. It also doubles as a way to tie your gear down if need be.

3. Range Belt ($12.46) – Pick from olive, black, tan or coyote for a belt that’s 1.75 inches wide and made out of nylon webbing. Its discreet look transitions well from duty to everyday wear.

4. Reinforced Instructor’s Belt ($30.95) – Designed after traditional rescue and riggers belts, this 1.5 inch wide belt has polymer reinforcement between two layers of nylon.

5. Frequent Flyer Belt ($33.95) – The Wilderness Tactical Products brings a travel-friendly belt to market that is 100% non-metallic and has been fully endorsed by the senior editor of Shotgun News.

6. Operator Belt ($34.99) – Another selection from 5.11 that is similar to the TDU belt yet features a solid stainless steel buckle instead of a plastic one.

On a side note, all Propper tactical pants (original weight and lightweight) come with a free nylon tactical belt. Considering the pants only cost $29.99 that is quite a value.

So, there you have it. Three cheers for tactical belts everywhere because they’re more than just practical. They’re stylish.

Suzi Brent a.k.a. Nee Naw

When compared to the U.S., there are some major contrasts with emergency medicine in the United Kingdom. There’s the service funding, the public heath care and even the number you call. (Note: Dial “999″ for help—not “911.”)

Despite the differences, people are generally the same. Everywhere.

It was those very people who drove London native Suzi Brent to the blogosphere in 2005. Not everyone irked her—just those who rang “999″ as if it were a personal butler service. Working as an emergency medical dispatcher, Brent typed out her adventures in the busy London call center a few times a month at Nee Naw, her blog inspired by Tom Reynolds’ Random Acts of Reality.

Now the blog has been turned into a book.

Published by Penguin Books, Nee Naw: Real Life Dispatches from Ambulance Control is a 320-page, behind-the-scenes narrative that covers three years of Brent’s life. We caught up with the author via e-mail and discovered that U.K. emergency medical dispatchers do indeed wear tactical pants, though they call them combat trousers. Oh, and they’re green!

What was your inspiration for writing the book?

I started writing the blog because when I was taking “999″ calls it struck me how little people knew about the emergency ambulance service and the “right” way to make a “999″ call. Of course, it’s not appropriate to start lecturing people about how the system works when they’re in the midst of an emergency, so I hoped that if I wrote about my experiences, people would see it and be better prepared when the time came to call us.

What do you hope people learn from reading your book and blog? If you don’t mind us asking, how much of it is exaggeration versus the truth?

There were two main things I hoped people would learn: That they should only call for an ambulance when they really need one, and how to be a good caller and help us to help them.

All of the stories in the book are true. While I’ve changed some details to protect confidentiality and for the sake of confidentiality used a little poetic license, I wouldn’t say any of them are exaggerated. There are so many weird, shocking and horrific calls to deal with that I don’t need to exaggerate!

When you decided to become a medical dispatcher, did you ever imagine writing a book about it? Have you always been a writer?

I’ve always written as a hobby—at school I constantly carted a diary around with me detailing the minutiae of my existence. I guess the blog was really just a continuation of this. I never expected it to get the amount of attention it did or that it would become a book. Because I know how much competition there is in the world of publishing, I was amazed and delighted when Penguin told me they were interested.

We’re sure you get this all the time, but tell us about the strangest call you’ve ever received.

Just one? It probably has to be the lady who had a chili pepper inside a very delicate orifice, and rang us for advice for what she should do. Well, taking it out would be a good start…

You haven’t posted to your blog since the end of 2009. Will you start posting again regularly? Did you take a hiatus because of the book?

I was promoted last year, which means I don’t take “999″ calls any more—I’m now the person who makes decisions about which ambulance goes where and suchlike—and felt my stories were becoming less personal. The publication of the book seemed like a natural end to the blog, but I haven’t given up writing. Nee Naw may return one day, especially if my career takes a different turn at some point in the future.

Do medical dispatchers wear tactical pants? What is your uniform like?

Yes, we do wear tactical pants, although we call them combat trousers! In fact we wear exactly the same uniform as paramedics (green trousers, green shirt and fleece, steel toe-capped boots), which I find a bit odd as our working conditions couldn’t be more different and most of the time the people we speak to wouldn’t know if we were sitting answering the phone wearing our pajamas and sporting large pink Mohawks!

What advice would you give to someone interested in becoming an emergency medical dispatcher?

See a psychiatrist! No, seriously—I’d tell them that it is one of the most rewarding jobs you can do, that you can go home feeling like you really achieved something and that you have the ability to change people’s lives forever despite only having a few minutes’ contact where they never see your face or learn your name.

It’s not an easy job but if you can cope with the long hours, the verbal abuse, the frustration of dealing with time-wasters and the horror of dealing with some unimaginable tragedies, the day you deliver your first baby or assist in your first successful resus will stay with you and change your life forever. It really is an amazing job.

Now that you’ve heard from Brent about her experiences as an EMD, share yours. Tell us about the most rewarding and/or challenging part about your job.

Mark your calendars because in two weeks the follow-up to TLC’s Police Women franchise hits the airwaves.

Police Women of Memphis, a 12-part series, will track four female officers with the Memphis Police Department, one of the nation’s largest police departments, as they cruise the South’s mean streets. For fans of TLC’s Police Women of Broward County and Maricopa County, this reality series will be a continuation of celebrating women in law enforcement.

While Officers Aubrey Olson, Arica Logan, Joy Jefferson and Virginia Awkward have already filmed the series, there’s still a thing or two these ladies can glean by watching some former TV policewomen.

We looked back to find the most infamous TV moments and documented what they have taught us all. That way, when Police Women of Memphis premiers Thursday, May 27 at 9 p.m. EST, we’ll see if they should heed the following advice…

1. Cagney & Lacey’s Mary Beth Lacey (Tyne Daly): Don’t let your partner get away with anything.

2. T.J. Hooker’s Officer Stacey Sheridan (Heather Locklear): Don’t go undercover as an exotic dancer unless you look like Heather Locklear.

3. The Sheild’s Captain Monica Rawling (Glenn Close): Never let a boy into the girl’s bathroom.

4. Police Women of Broward County’s Andrea Penoyer: Be able to switch from mommy mode into badass-cop mode within a moment’s notice.

5. The Closer’s Chief Brenda Leigh Johnson (Kyra Sedgwick): Do whatever it takes to get your point across.

6. Third Watch’s Sergeant Maritza Cruz (Tia Texada): Talk to whoever you need to talk to get the job done.

7. The Mod Squad’s Julie Barnes (Peggy Lipton): Always let your partners know when you have a hunch.

8. Southland’s Lydia Adams (Regina King): Be vocal about your likes and dislikes.

(Image via TLC)

We all make on-the-job blunders. But when that oh-no moment occurs and the cameras are rolling—that’s the real mistake. Witness more than a dozen law enforcement officers have that similar stomach-dropping experience, especially when they discover someone is watching.

1. The Dancing Cop – You know you’ve done it to … just when you think nobody’s watching.

2. Where’d the Bad Guys Go? – These thieves almost get caught, but the key word here is *almost*. UPDATE: Scratch that. We hear this footage is actually from a movie. What a relief!

3. Boo! – We guess this trick would scare the bejesus out of anyone—even a law enforcement officer.

4. Police Bust Fail – Just like they say, nothing beats a rookie’s first day.

5. Insane Parking Job – There’s not much a cop can do when in pursuit of speed racer.

6. Cop vs. Cop – This really is no laughing matter though nobody was seriously injured.

7. Gun Pro – Ah, an infamous video with those ironic last words: “I’m the only one in the room professional enough that I know of to carry this Glock.”

8. Parking Break Fail – Instead of hunting down criminals, this cop is chasing after his patrol car. Warning: This has NSFW language.

9. Cat vs. Cop – We don’t know who deserves more sympathy—the annoyed cop or the needy kitty.

10. The Jogger – If you escape from prison and tell a cop you’re just out for a run, clearly you’re a criminal mastermind.

11. Dog vs. Cop Car – We posted this one a few weeks ago and obviously cannot get enough.

12. The Nonchalant Car Thief – Never assume that someone won’t steal something just because a cop is standing nearby.

13. Bike Cop – This one borders on pathetic. Sorry!

Did we leave one out? Share your favorite links to other police bloopers in the comments section.

The face of Tactical Nuclear Penguin

Earlier this month we discovered the most tactical beer on the planet. Not long after, Tactical Nuclear Penguin made the long journey from Scotland to the U.S. coast.

Because of its ridiculous potency (it has a 32 percent alcohol by volume), the recent import is making a pretty loud splash stateside. Said to be six times stronger than good ole Budweiser, the penguin beer has been compared to other radical imports like absinthe.

Jim Watt, co-founder of Brew Dog, chatted with us via e-mail about his creation that will soon appear at Whole Foods supermarkets in California and New York.

‘Tactical Nuclear Penguin’ is a pretty random and hilarious name. Where did it come from?

This video kinda explains it. Oh, and we really like penguins.

Would you consider your approach to beer-making ‘tactical’? If so, in what way?

No, we are not very tactical. We just tend to follow our muse and see what type of trouble it lands us in. You can see exactly how we reclaimed the strongest beer title here…

What do you think would happen if a real penguin drank TNP?

It happens most weekends in Fraserburgh. Most of the nonsense in the Tactical Nuclear Penguin video was the result of a penguin drinking TNP!

We suggest trying TNP while donning a nice pair of tactical pants. What would you deem as appropriate TNP-drinking attire?

I would suggest really dressing up for the occasion. A dinner suit and black bow tie combined with an air of aristocratic nonchalance would be perfect!

Any other tactical beers in Brew Dog’s future?

Of course. Maybe one infused with raspberries! Tactical Raspberry Penguin anyone?

Gray Powell - "4G" iPhone = Lifetime of Tactical Pants!!!

It’s easy to misplace your cell phone. It could happen to anyone, really.

But when you’re an Apple software engineer, and your phone is a prototype of the next iPhone … well, calling it a “mistake” is a nice way of putting it.

This mishap has turned Gray Powell into an overnight celebrity. And here at TacticalPants.com headquarters, we want to make sure he never has to go through the stress of leaving a fourth-generation iPhone in a San Francisco bar again.

How do we plan to accomplish such a feat?

While some have offered to help Powell drown his sorrows, we’re giving him something better: A lifetime supply of tactical pants! Just think, with the always-trusty cell phone/mag pocket, he needn’t worry about top-secret gadgets slipping away.

He’ll receive one pair for the next 20 years, which in tactical pants years, we estimate that’s about 4,000. OK, that’s a bit of an exaggeration, but you get the idea.

Do you think Powell would have found himself in the same situation if he’d just worn tactical trousers to the bar? We think not.

(Image via Gizmodo)

Apparently so. While this picture was attached to an e-mail that came from someone else inside TacticalPants.com headquarters, it certainly wasn’t our workspace.

And apologies for being so quiet this week, but we’re hard at work completing the Tactical Pants Buying Guide — a comprehensive look of all the major tactical pants players out there. Slated for release sometime next week, the guide will cover every aspect of tactical pants that you’ve ever dreamed of knowing.

Here is a sneak peek from the guide … a snippet from an intense interview with Fernando Coelho, EOTAC’s founder and lead designer.

“There’s a big difference between just taking a pair of pants and slapping pockets on it and saying its tactical. If I want that, I can walk into Kohls or Macy’s or hell even Wal-Mart. There are brands out there that are selling like Dockers-style pants with cargo pockets that aren’t much different then what our tactical world is trying to sell as tactical. Your pant has to fit correctly. The pockets have to be in the right angles. They have to accommodate the right equipment. They have to have a certain level of durability. These are all critical things.”

If that doesn’t get you on the edge of your seat, then we don’t know what will!

It might be April Fools, but this beer is no joke. Tactical Nuclear Penguin is the strongest beer was the strongest beer in the world for a short period of time last year.

While it no longer holds that world record, it is by far the most tactical beverage around. And with an alcohol by volume of 32%, it still packs a pretty potent punch.

The brew comes wrapped in a brown paper bag with a cute lil’ penguin doodled on the side. The bottles and beer have a black licorice color emphasizing its powerful nature. It even contains a warning label that reads: “This is an extremely strong beer, it should be enjoyed in small servings and with an air of aristocratic nonchalance. In exactly the same manner that you would enjoy a fine whisky, a Frank Zappa album or a visit from a friendly yet anxious ghost.”

Brew Dog, an independent Scottish brewery, dreamed up the concoction by developing a completely unique process. This 18-month method includes storing the beer at a near-arctic temperature of -20 degrees for three weeks in the final stages. That’s what gives it its extra alcohol content.

Tactical Nuclear Penguin is extremely potent, and it is also extremely pricey. It costs $68 for an 11.2 ounce bottle including shipping and exchange rates. Obviously this is a drink that’s meant to be cherished — not sloshed into a beer bong.

Tactical Nuclear Penguin from BrewDog on Vimeo.

Watch two guys in their living room unveil a bottle of the first batch of Tactical Nuclear Penguin. They discuss whether or not it’s technically a beer and decide they really don’t give a hoot. At first taste, one exclaims: “You know, that’s super mellow! There’s some nice coffee and some malt tastes. There’s also a smoky tobacco taste.”

In this review, Tactical Nuclear Penguin is deemed a hybrid of a beer and a spirit with certain softness and a surprisingly light body.

Mark Dredge unwraps his bottle and notices the beer’s thick legs. He describes it as woody, oaky, smoky, yeasty, fruity and, above all, boozy. “It kind of clears your nose a little bit.”

Every product needs a slogan. A catchphrase. Something that has a ring to it. The kind of ring that makes you want to repeat it to your friends. And family. And strategically place in the punch lines of jokes.

Nike has “Just do it.” Budweiser? “This bud’s for you.” So that got us thinking … what do tactical pants have? A whole bunch of nothing. This specific product category hasn’t even garnered a second glance until very recently.

As luck would have it, we came across an advertising slogan generator at precisely the same time as our catchphrase epiphany. With its help, we were able to come up with 16 totally unoriginal, nonsensical (yet utterly hilarious) potential slogans for future tac pants campaigns. Can you come up with a better one?

(Image via Flickr)